


i can wait / i can wait

by annewithanl



Category: Anne of Green Gables - L. M. Montgomery, Anne with an E (TV)
Genre: Alternate Universe - College/University, Alternate Universe - High School, Alternate Universe - Modern Setting, Give Jane a personality 2020, I'll updated tags when I can think of more to say um, Jane is angsty, Jane's POV, Lesbian!Jane, Not really any plot (yet), POV Minor Character, exploring lesser characters, minor shirbert, not sure about that last tag but maybe, this is basically just me pretending Jane was a main character lol, will jane get a gf? who knows
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2020-10-21
Updated: 2020-10-27
Packaged: 2021-03-09 03:00:18
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 2
Words: 4,564
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/27136984
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/annewithanl/pseuds/annewithanl
Summary: "Jane felt trapped. Caught in between the past and the future, unable to find a stable foothold in the ever changing present. She didn’t know what she wanted. She wanted everything."aka I wanted to read something exploring Jane and her personality so I wrote it instead!title from "the predatory wasp of the palisades is out to get us!" by sufjan stevens :)
Comments: 6
Kudos: 2





	1. everything i feel returns to you somehow

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> hey sorry i havent update my other wips. i most likely Will Not but here's a jane fic which no one asked for instead :)
> 
> idk if this is very in character but i hope u enjoy!
> 
> (btw it wasnt beta'd so sorry if there are any mistakes - please do let me know!!)
> 
> (chapter title is from "the only thing" by sufjan stevens)

**Early Nov. First Snow**

Jane rolled her eyes.

“You can’t even  _ add _ ,” she glared at her brother, sighing as he spluttered to try to defend himself to an amused Josie.

She sped up to walk in line with them, but Josie stopped her.

“Go away, Jane!”

“What?”

“We don’t need a chaperone!” Josie turned back to Jane’s brother, batting her eyelids disgustingly.

Jane crossed her arms as she watched them disappear around a bend, huffing as she tried to decide what to do next.

Her phone chimed, and she reached into the warm pocket of her grey winter coat to retrieve it. It was a message from Tillie.

_hey jane 3 :31pm _

_ anne, di and i are going to get hot chocolate from  ms lynde’s, do u wanna come? 3:32 pm _

_ rubes is already there with moody 3:32 pm _

Jane grinned. She didn’t want to spend her Saturday afternoon alone, but had never been good at asking people to hang out (except, perhaps, Josie).

_ why coudldnt u have asked me when i was still with  u guys?? 3:33pm _

_ but sure ill come i guess 3:33pm _

She waited a moment, phone in hand, eyes on her lockscreen, a picture of Josie from halloween last year which matched Josie’s picture of Jane, an uncomfortable feeling in her stomach.

The phone chimed again. The feeling disappeared.

_ great, see u in a bit<3 3:34pm _

With that, Jane took off in the direction her brother and best friend had gone not long before, with thoughts only of how long it had been since she’d tasted the Lynde family hot chocolate.

As she pushed open the door to Mrs Lyndes _ ’ _ , an Avonlea cafe which was a favourite of all the locals, came into view, Jane saw her friends at the corner table, their laughs ringing around the air towards her. Tillie looked up just as she began to walk towards them.

“Jaaane!!” She exclaimed, and the table erupted into a small chorus of “Jane!”s in canon.

“Hey guys, how’s it going?”

“Jane, come sit,” Ruby’s eyes were bright as she tapped the empty seat beside her, waited for Jane to sit, and continued, “How were things with Jane and Billy? Where are they?”

Jane shrugged, looking away and accidentally catching Gilbert’s eye, a moment of strange understanding passing between them.

Gilbert. Sometimes Jane thought she had a crush on him. All the girls did, really (although Ruby had had dibs on him until she fell for Moody), so she must have had some feelings, right? But, if she was being honest, she hadn’t, not ever. She’d only ever thought of him as a friend. It was the same with all the Avonlea boys, but Josie always said she’d meet her match when she went to college, so Jane didn’t lose faith.

“Well,” Ruby sensed the subject needed changing, “Do you wanna order?”

“Yeah, I’ll go now, actually. Anyone else need anything?”

At Charlie’s request of an order of fries, Jane made her way towards the counter followed by Tillie.

“Is everything okay?” The brunette asked, a concerned look on her face.

“Yeah, I’m fine!” 

“You sure?”

“Yes, Tills.”

“Okay. You can talk to me about anything, you know that right?”

Jane looked at her friend’s eyes, and nodded softly, before being interrupted by the sharp voice of their favourite shop owner.

“Jane Andrews, looking so grown up! What can I get you?” The girl in question whipped her head back around.

“Hello Mrs Lynde. Could I have a hot chocolate, please. And a round of fries for Charlie.”

“Of course, my dear,” Mrs Lynde scurried around the back to ask her husband to make the fries, before returning to make the hot chocolate. “So how’ve you been, my dearies? Any news?”

The girls told them they were well, and chatted about how school was going.

“And how’s your brother? I hear he and Josie Pye have been getting real close these days...”

Josie bristled and stood up straighter. “I don’t know, Mrs Lynde, but I won’t be  _ gossiping  _ about my family.” 

The woman harrumphed, turning her attention to the drinks, and they stood in silence, before paying and returning to the table.

“She’s so nosy!” Tillie laughed.

“Yeah..but we are too, to be fair.” Jane joined in with the laughter, passing Charlie his fries.

“So,” Moody waited for Anne and Diana to stop giggling about something they had just remembered, before continuing. “I was thinking tonight I’d host a little..get together. How do you guys feel about that?”

The table erupted into cheers, and Moody took that as a ‘yes’, looking proud of himself.

“Okay, okay, I’ll have to go home and get set up first, and kick my parents out. You all can stay over if you want too.”

Jane let out an inward sigh. She was used to going to Josie’s after these things, just the two of them. But things had been so weird lately. It was all Billy’s fault, he always had to ruin everything good Jane had. Whatever, they probably wouldn't come tonight anyway. 

Moody got up to leave, Charlie and Ruby going with him. Diana and Anne decided to go to the Barry’s to get dressed up for the party, leaving Gilbert, Tillie and Jane at the table. 

There was a moment of hesitation, before the trio decided (not needing to get changed for something they didn’t deem important enough to be dressed up for) to walk to visit Cole at the small, local art gallery where he worked on weekends.

“So, Gilbert,” Tillie winked at Jane, “how are things with Anne,”

The boy raised his eyebrow.

“Anne?”

“Oh, don’t play dumb,” Tillie nudged him, linking arms with him as Jane moved to his other side and did the same.

“Yeah, we  _ know  _ you like her. It’s very obvious.” Jane chimed in

“Oh, come on, guys” He waited for them to concede, but was forced to continue to attempt to defend himself. “It’s not like that with Anne. Actually, I don’t know what it’s like. She’s so unpredictable. And she hates my guts,” he sighed.

“But, don’t you guys have all those family dinners together?”

“Well, yeah but...I don’t know, when we’re not arguing it’s just...I don’t know, she looks at me so strangely, like she doesn’t know me or something.”

Jane shivered.

“What about  _ you _ , Tillie?”

“Yeah,” Jane joined in, “how’s your  _ two _ -boy-problem?” Now it was Tillie’s turn to blush, batting Jane’s shoulder behind Gilbert.

“Whatever,” she said, receiving a scoff from her friends.

“Jane? Any guys for you?” Gilbert continued his revenge. “Or girls?”

“What? Girls?” Jane’s mouth felt dry. “No, of course not.”

Identical confusing expressions occupied her friends’ faces for just a moment, and Jane’s hands suddenly felt very cold, but then they were at the gallery and all was forgotten.,

“Cole!” Tillie broke away from the trio and ran to hug him. 

“You guys! How are you? Long time no see!”

Cole had always been more Anne’s friend than anyone else (Jane had avoided him loyally after he scorned her best friend), until he left school to live with Diana’s aunt Josephine. Now he was working at the gallery, studying for college entrance exams, and living his best life, and it was in this time that his social life had flourished too - all of Anne’s friends loved him too now. Jane wondered how it could be that, after he was more cut off than everyone than ever, that he could be so happy, so open. She made a mental note to ask him sometime.

The four of them chatted and laughed in the small gift shop, Cole pretending to be helping them look for something when his boss came in. 

Gilbert remembered the party, and asked him if he’d like to come. Cole told them he’d love to. 

The brunettes went to find the bathroom.

“How’re things with you, Jane?”

She nodded absentmindedly.

“And with Josie?”

Jane closed her eyes. “Why does everyone keep asking me that?” 

“Cause she’s your friend!” Cole laughed. Her eyes remained shut. “Isn’t she?”

“Cole,” Jane looked up at him, then down to the floor, crossing her arms. “Cole, you seem so happy. After everything that’s happened, all the shit that happened to you, I mean you don’t even talk to your family anymore. How are you so much happier than you were..before all this?”

Cole’s expression, the way his eyes met hers, sent a shiver down Jane’s spine.

“Because I’m honest now. I let people in and allowed them to love me. And some of them couldn’t and that was hard, but, I’m better off for it. Jane, whatever you’re...feeling, it’s okay, it’s going to be okay. And I know we’ve never been close, so it might be hard for you to talk to me but talk to Anne. She taught me that I was enough, that I was a part of this world and it needed me and she saved me. I’m not scared anymore. I hope you feel that way.”

“I don’t...I think you’ve got it wrong, I-”

“Hey guys, what are you talking about?” Tillie was back from the restroom.

Jane swallowed and folded her arms again, shrugging and allowing a bored expression to cloud her face once again.

“Nothing. We were just- nothing.”

* * *

**Later.**

  
  


The door to the Spurgeon house swung open, revealing a cluttered, homely hallway, and the host’s happy face.

“Hey guys! You’re the first guests here! Aside from Ruby and Charlie, obviously. How was your afternoon? Oh you brought Cole? How are you Cole?” Moody was clearly in a good mood, and when Jane saw Ruby’s identical expression she thought she had a pretty good guess as to why that was.

Jane pulled the two girls into Moody’s blue kitchen.

“So?” She exclaimed.

“So what?” Ruby’s smile widened further, and she was unable to contain herself. “Moody asked me out!”

“Finally!” Her friends cried in unison, and the trio collapsed into giggles, Ruby attempting to maintain some sort of quiet (and failing!).

“Okay! Okay, come on girls,” She shushed them after some moments. “Come on we should help finish setting up, come on.”

Jane rolled her eyes and allowed herself to be led into the living room, pulling Tillie in behind her.

It turned out that “help finish setting up” meant dance to Moody’s shitty playlist (Jane would have to get her hands on the aux soon) and laugh at Charlie as he tried to put up some fairy lights.

Jane looked at Ruby and Tillie, a study in pink and green, respectively. Did they feel like she did? Like they weren’t themselves? Like, perhaps, they hadn’t been for years? LIke they’d been lying to everyone, but didn’t know the truth? Was this normal? This feeling of terror?

She knew she was mean. That she did dumb things, and hurt people, and said things she didn’t mean and she was so  _ full _ of  _ regret _ . But she didn’t know how to stop, couldn’t find a way to be any different. She couldn’t even find the way to apologise.

Suddenly it was later, and the house was busier and Jane was a little tired and a lot happy and warm, on a cold Winter’s night in her friend’s living room. 

She sat down on the red-brown sofa. A voice which was to her like a lullaby in its familiarity broke her calmness.

“Hey everyone!” Josie was here, in a purple slip dress Jane hadn’t seen before. Billy seemed to have stayed home.

“Jose, you came!” Tillie made her way towards the new arrival, bringing her to the other end of the sofa to chat with her.

“Hey Josie,” Jane suddenly felt cold. “Your dress is pretty.”

“Thanks! Billy got it for me. I’m so happy I found the only acceptable guy in this town.” Her smug expression was unbearable. As an afterthought, she added “I can't wait for you to meet someone like him at college!”

Jane nodded and walked to the hallway. “Someone like him?” What did that mean? She already knew someone like him, and that was more than enough. Why she would ever want more than one Billy in her life was beyond her. 

Jane sat on the stair in the hallway, hand on her chin. She took out her phone to scroll absentmindedly so she didn't look like a loner if anyone saw her.

She looked at her instagram profile. She had archived all her posts not long ago in a moment of self-consciousness, and hadn’t regretted it. Her profile picture was a selfie of her and Josie from the summer, the pair of them clad in matching blue bikinis. She clicked on Josie’s profile next, and was met with a (familiar) collection of carefully curated, always perfect, selfies, portraits, landscape shots, and paid promotions for small companies. Yes, Josie was well on her way to becoming an instagram influencer. Jane found herself in a picture from a couple of months ago, the pair of them posing with coffee’s from Mrs Lynde’s. 

She was shaken from her obsessive scrolling by a cough. She looked up. Gilbert stood awkwardly before her. She stared at him for a moment, before realising he was indicating for her to move over so he could sit beside her. She did as she was expected.

“You okay?” He asked. God, she could see why Anne got annoyed with him sometimes. He was just so  _ good.  _ But she knew that wasn’t what annoyed Anne.

“I’m fine.”

“You just seem different lately. Distant.” He glanced down at her phone, and Josie Pye’s face looked back at him. “Are things okay between you and Josie?”

“Yes, they’re fine! I wasn’t- she’s-” Jane’s chest felt tight, like it had before her exams last year, and she’s had to leave early. “Just leave it Gilbert.”

“Okay,” he conceded. They sat in silence for a moment, until Gilbert pulled her up and into the kitchen, where they found Anne and Ruby. Gilbert poured the four of them a drink each.

“So how’re you all enjoying the party?” Ruby asked, eyes wide with joy. 

Jane nodded.

“It’s been fun Ruby! But the music sucks,” Anne added. Jane laughed and agreed.

“Yeah you’re right, Moody has terrible taste in music,” Gilbert joined in. He was met with a confused, mildly irritated expression from Anne.

God, they were so annoying, Jane thought to herself. How long was it going to take for them to just admit they liked each other? It had been obvious that they did for as long as Anne had been in Avonlea, and yet they still danced around each other. She made a mental note to talk to Josie about this later. 

Perhaps she wouldn’t have to wait long though, because here was Josie now.

“Hey Josie!” Ruby grinned, before squealing and dragging Anne into the living room, because her favourite song had just come on. Gilbert looked between the two girls who were left, then quietly excused himself.

Jane tugged on the sleeve of her thick yellow cardigan. 

“So...are you enjoying the party?” Josie asked.

Jane looked up without moving her head.

“Yeah. Are you?”

“Yeah, I guess. It’s nice to see everyone.”

“You saw them this morning. And everyday at school.”

Yeah. Yeah I know. But, you know what I mean. I feel like I haven’t really spent time with you,” Josie trailed some fingers through her ponytail. “You  _ guys _ , I mean. I’ve just been so busy I haven’t had a chance to catch up.”

Jane nodded slowly, voice caught in her throat.

“I miss you, y’know.” Josie’s voice was quiet now, but Jane could hear it perfectly through all the noise of the party.

They stood like that for a moment, a softness in the air which made Jane ache.

And then, like Jane had simply imagined it all, the moment was over and Josie snapped back into the weird, over-enthusiastic yet strangely distanced mood she had been in for so long now, telling Jane she had to call Billy and striding into the garden.

Jane felt trapped. Caught in between the past and the future, unable to find a stable foothold in the ever changing present. She didn’t know what she wanted. She wanted everything.

She said goodbye to Tillie and walked home alone that night, and dreamt of purple sunsets. 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> that's the end of chapter one! i may add more but i don't have any plot outline (yet..)  
> please let me know what you think, if you have any constructive criticism, if you have any ideas for what might happen next etc etc   
> i can be found on twitter as @sapphicsantina


	2. the worst thing that i ever did / was what i did to you

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> summer comes, jane and gilbert hang out a bit, we have the jane misogyny storyline as seen in s3.
> 
> chapter title (of course) comes from betty by taylor swift :)

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> !! this chapter has mentions of sexual assault. i wasn't sure whether to write about josie and billy's storyline in season 3, but its a pretty important storyline so i couldn't leave it out. there are no graphic descriptions or anything like that, its just implied i guess because we all know what happened, if that makes sense. of course this is a sensitive topic, so please let me know if i should change anything !!

The rest of senior year was pretty average, Jane danced enthusiastically at the christmas fair, and modelled for one of Cole’s paintings and stressed over the exams and laughed with the girls at a sleepover or two. When summer time drew nearer, she almost got excited for the trip her parents were planning. That was, until she found out Josie was coming as Billy’s  _ girlfriend  _ this year, and not just as Jane’s friend. And she wouldn’t even have Prissy, who was staying with her new friend Winnifred, to keep her company.

So she feigned illness in the days before they left and was allowed to stay home, with their housekeeper for company. 

But Tillie and Ruby were both on family holidays and Diana and Anne were staying with Aunt Josephine, so for a time she was lonely, and spent days alone at the beach. One morning, over a breakfast of croissants and orange juice (she liked to pretend she lived in Europe), she received a text from Gilbert.

_ hey, how’s the holiday? 10:02 am  _

She must’ve mentioned that she was going away, and that Josie was coming (because that was surely why he was texting), but not her change of plans, to him last time the group was together.

_ i ended up not going actually 10:03 am _

_ im sick 10:03 am _

_ ish 10:03 am _

She waited for a reply, but none came, so brought her plate in from the garden to wash it up. Just as she was drying it, the doorbell rang.

“Gilbert?” Why was he standing outside her door like this was a normal occurrence? And how had he got here so quickly?

“Sorry,” He looked sheepishly at his feet, then back at her. “I was in the area and I saw your text, so, you know, I just wanted to check in.”

She motioned for him to come inside, saying “You know I’m not actually sick, right?” They sat at the kitchen table.

“What’s going on Jane? Why didn’t you go with them?”

She tapped the table quietly with each of the fingers on her right hand from left to right, and then back again.

“I just- I hate seeing them together. And I feel awful for it, because I think she’s actually happy (though I can’t see how), but it just makes me feel so…I don’t know, weird? And I don’t understand why.”

Gilbert nodded, kindly.

“I think you do know why, Jane. But it’s okay if you can’t say it just now. It can wait.”

The kitchen was silent and still, and there was a beautiful orange light coming through the window.

“And Jane?” She looked at him. “You’re all alone here aren’t you?” (She nodded.) “Come stay at mine.”

“Oh, no I’m fine, really.”

“Come on Andrews, we’ve got plenty of space.” She shook her head again. “It doesn't have to be the whole time, just a couple of nights at least. Mary won’t take no for an answer once she finds out you’re here alone.”

Jane rolled her eyes, but Gilbert could see her considering it.

“You’d be doing us a favour, anyway. Mary’s missing having a girl around the house (Delphine’s too young to count), now that Anne’s away, so she’d love to have you over. Bash, too.”

A few moments passed.

“Okay. But let me help around the house a little, to pay you back.”

Gilbert stopped himself from laughing at  _ Jane Andrews  _ asking to help out. But he knew she was trying to be good.

“Of course, you didn’t think we’d let you stay for free, did you?” He grinned.

Later, Gilbert sat on the sofa in Jane’s living room (which looked like something he’d buy in The Sims after using a cheat to become rich, but he wasn’t complaining), while she went to pack some clothes and other necessities for the next few nights, and say goodbye to the housekeeper.

“Jane! It’s so nice to meet you, I’ve heard so much!” There was pity in Mary’s eyes as she opened the door to Gilbert’s house, and Jane wondered what Gilbert had said.

“All good things I hope,” Jane’s voice quivered with awkwardness and she cringed at the cliche.

Then Bash came out, their daughter Delphine in his arms.

“Ms Andrews, how nice it is to see you!” Jane had met Sebastian at the Christmas Panto last year (he had accidentally dropped a plank on her brother’s head, she had hoped it would make Billy normal - it hadn’t but she was thankful nonetheless). “How are you enjoying the summer?” 

She just smiled and nodded, self conscious and confused by the unconditional kindness Gilbert’s family were showing her.

“So,” Gilbert broke the silence, “Should I show you your room?” 

She followed him to the spare room and set her stuff down.

“Thank you Gilbert.” 

“It’s no trouble.”

  
  


While she was staying at the Blythe-Lacroix Orchard, Jane’s spirits lifted so that she was almost unrecognisable from the cold, closed off girl Gilbert knew her to be. She helped in the garden and supported the cooking of meals and accompanied the family to town on errands. It was strange to feel so relaxed all the time, like she didn’t have to hide anymore.

The only time her mood shifted was when someone mentioned Josie (or her family, or school, or college, or anything else that reminded her of the future or the past). It wasn’t that she became angry; just distant. And tired. So they avoided the topics and ate oranges at the beach and watched Tangled and everybody teased Gilbert about Anne.

After four days and three nights of this, Jane received two phone calls, which she took in the garden. The first was from her family’s housekeeper, informing her that the family would be home the next day, with no reason as to why. The next answered this question, though, as it was Tillie. 

Jane had never seen Josie cry. In fact, she found it hard to imagine that anyone had. But it seemed that she had just done so on the phone to Tillie, who now relayed this to Jane (who couldn’t help but feel jealous that it was Tillie who had heard, and not her, but then it was her own fault for being so distant these past few months).

When the phone call ended, Jane’s face was pale, and Gilbert watched her tap her fingers against each other, just as she had done on the table the other day.

“What’s wrong?”

“It’s Josie, she… She says Billy- She says he hurt her.”

A pause.

“Shit.”

Gilbert sat Jane down on the front porch, placing a hand on her shoulder.

“Do you..do you know what happened?”

No answer.

“Do you want to talk about it?”

Still no answer. Jane just looked outwards, deep in thought. After what felt like an age, she said “Well. I think we’ll have to wait to hear the other side of the story, don’t you?”

“Um,” Gilbert raised an eyebrow. Jane stood up. “Jane, I don’t think- I mean, come on, it’s Billy. I don’t think there is another side of the story.”

“Listen, Josie’s not exactly...well she’s not very trustworthy is she? She’s not, like, a  _ good  _ girl, you know? So, I wouldn’t be surprised if her side of the story was….made up.” With that, she began to walk out into the orchard.

“Jane?!” Gilbert leapt up and grabbed her arm to stop her. “Are you really- I mean I know you’re not much of a feminist,” Jane scoffed, “But that is  _ so  _ backwards. You know I’m not Josie’s biggest fan but this isn’t- I mean she’s your best friend!”

“And Billy's my brother!” Jane strode away, leaving Gilbert to stand in shock for a second, before he ran to catch up.

“Come on Jane, what’s this really about? You hate Billy? And anyway, how can you be so against feminism when  _ Prissy _ is your sister?”

“This has nothing to do with Prissy!” Jane kept walking.

“Jane please! Just stop for a second-”

Just then a familiar redhead came into view.

“Anne?” The pair said in unison, as the girl in question came closer.

“Did you guys hear about Josie?” Anne asked. “How are you feeling Jane?”

She looked sympathetically at the blonde, who just folded her arms.

“Jane’s  _ fine  _ actually!” Gilbert said sarcastically. “Because, you know, this is all  _ Josie’s  _ fault.”

“What?” Anne exclaimed, just as Jane protested “I didn’t say that!” She looked at Anne. ”I did not say that. I just said, you know, we shouldn’t jump to conclusions. You of all people know Josie’s not known for her honesty!”

“Jane Andrews what is  _ wrong  _ with you?” Anne shouted. “Josie is your friend! How could you say something like that?”

“I don’t get it, what’s so wrong with questioning the information we’re given?”

“It’s wrong because Josie has been hurt. And she needs us right now, not your horrible misogynistic brother!”

Jane looked away, and Gilbert could’ve sworn there was shame in her eyes. Anne sensed it too, and the pair exchanged a look before Anne said “Jane, why don’t we go sit down. Gilbert, can you bring us out some drinks?” The boy raised an eyebrow, before running to the house. The girls sat under an apple tree, leaning against its trunk in the warm, early august sun.

“When did you and Diana get back, anyway.” 

“Oh, late last night. I was planning on sleeping all day until Tillie called.”

“You? Sleep all night?”

“It was really late!” Anne laughed. She and Jane had never really been close - not one-on-one, anyway. But she liked Jane, when she wasn’t being mean. “So...what’s been going with you and Josie?”

“What? Nothing! What?” Anne laughed inwardly at Jane’s lack of subtlety, but then she felt bad. She had learnt a lot from her friendships with people like Cole, and Gilbert, who had had less usual lives, and even from her own life, and she knew there was always a reason for why people acted the way they did, knew that Jane was worried about something and was lashing out because of it.

“Jane,” She put her hand on the girl’s shoulder, “I think there’s something else going on with you. I don’t think you’re mad at Josie, but at..yourself. And your lashing out because you don’t know what else to do.”

The sun was a little too bright, a little too warm on Jane’s cheeks.

“I’m scared,” She whispered. 

Jane had never seen Josie cry, that was true. But Josie had seen Jane cry, she was the only person who had (aside from during temper tantrums at her parents), until now.

She was sobbing on Anne’s shoulder, and Gilbert was there with a blanket for them to sit on, and they were trying tio calm her and all she could say was “I’m sorry. I’m sorry.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> some things:  
> \- prissy is with her "friend" winnie *wink wink*  
> \- i don't know if having a housekeeper is actually a thing or what that would involve but i wanted to convey that the andrews' have money so that was that  
> \- as you can probably tell from this fic im a big fan of gilbert and jane being friends in fanon so i tried to explore that more, and i also feel like jane and bash would get on well so i wanted to have her and the lacroixes (who could be so good for her !!) buttt i didn't write as much of them as i wanted to maybe they'll feature more in future, lmk if u have any ideas :)   
> \- im not excusing jane's actions, and this is by no means the "end" of her character development, but i wanted to look into why she did what she did.
> 
> anyway let me know if u have any improvements, especially for keeping everyone in character, as well as ideas for future chapters.
> 
> next chapter may be the girls going to queens! but maybe not idk


End file.
